Twelve graduates working at Milton weigh in about the School today


What is the same?

“The teachers,” Elaine Apthorp ’75 says. “Literally.”

Elaine is right. From their first Milton Academy faculty meeting, most of the 12 graduates were starkly aware that their own revered mentors and teaching legends were now officially peers.

This transition was one of many that each of them made in coming back to Milton, to work. None had planned to return; they were generally surprised, in different degrees, to find themselves on the Milton roster. They came from the nonprofit world, from the corporate world, from counseling, and from other schools—primary school through higher education.

Their student years at Milton span five decades (late 1940s through 1990s) and the differences among their individual experiences, social and academic, are many. To a great extent, these differences reflect the Milton of their days, along with political and cultural realities over time.

For everyone in the group, life outside of class was powerfully influential—sports, The Milton Paper, drama, the Speech Team, senior projects. Across the board, however, they agree that two strong themes define Milton. The first is the quality and challenge of the intellectual experience; the second is the powerful role of connections between faculty and students.

“I thought school was fun,” David Ball ’88 says. “The idea of a research paper? Bring it on. My teachers thought that attitude was normal. My friends thought it was normal, too. My teaching in other schools was not particularly personally rewarding, because that enthusiasm for learning isn’t the model in lots of other schools.”

“‘Good is the worst enemy of excellent,’ we used to hear batted about by faculty when we were here,” says Brad Richardson ’48. “There has always been a great sense of what excellence is here.”

“I loved my teachers in the Girls’ School,” says Sally Dey ’62. “I feel like a different person, now; Milton changed me,” Meg Foley Burke ’91 says. “I was shy and quiet in the classroom as a student here, and now I’m an overtly outspoken person. It turns out that Milton’s Harkness tables, which I found intimidating then, were really effective in helping me find my voice. While at Milton, I don’t think I really appreciated the emphasis placed on writing the ‘Milton Way.’ At times, I lovingly reflect on the process as ‘writing boot camp,’ but that is what I took away and value the most in my profession today, just as I did in my undergraduate and graduate programs beyond Milton—the ability to put my voice into words on paper.”

Having come to Milton from a large public high school in Los Angeles, Elaine Apthorp found that “At Milton I wasn’t the smartest student in every class, and I really enjoyed that. If someone was talented, others wanted to bring that out. I thought I’d died and gone to heaven.”

“Other than the much more healthy comfort level now between boys and girls in being genuine friends with one another,” says Caroline Sabin ’86, “Milton is the same place it was then, and that’s why I like it. I have 12–15 teenagers around the Harkness table every day who have done the reading. They’re not trying to get away from challenge, and they are truly excited about our discussion. They ask great questions. They love language. They stuck with me and tackled Beloved by Toni Morrison, and even the least confident student decided that The Kite Runner was not a great book: ‘The writing was flat; the cliché cliffhanger was uninspiring,’ they told me. At Milton you become a critical judge. It’s always been that way, and that’s one of the things I loved. We have serious discussions about words, and how to use words powerfully. Every minute, every class period is packed, unlike in college. One difference: my students now say ‘thank you’ at the end of class. I don’t remember doing that.”

“I’m not only connecting with students in the classroom,” says Patrice Jean-Baptiste ’88, who teaches in the performing arts department, coaches Speech Team and has been a dorm parent in Hathaway. “I’m connecting in the dorm, and in performance, but I really work at a whole other level with students as a Speech Team coach. I have to find out exactly who every person on my team is to help them choose material that will allow them to express themselves best in competition. And we travel together—weekend after weekend we spend in a close-knit group traveling to competitions.”

“Connections with teachers are central at Milton,” says Rod Skinner ’72 (director of college counseling), “but the irony is that my classmates talk about faculty not ‘getting’ them, probably because of the political dissent and the general challenging of authority that was happening on many campuses. That was peculiar to my time band at Milton; ground rules were shifting in significant ways. But there was never any hierarchical barrier between us and teachers. People like Chuck Duncan, Paul Monette, A.O. Smith, Ethan Bisbee and the Schorrs ended up being very special to me.”

Whatever the era, you can’t escape being a teenager when you’re in high school; the social perils of negotiating those years are a chapter in personal histories. Milton could be a kind place to spend those years, however. “You had the opportunity to move freely between roles and reinvent yourself,” Rod says. “You could be an actor, a musician, an athlete and a student.”

André Heard ’93 says, “My class had a term called social side-stepping. That meant that while there were circles of friends, you could, and did, move in and out of the circles, but you were no cooler, or less cool, for whatever group you hung with at a given time.”

“I was impressed when I came that at Milton, everybody was special,” Elaine says. “And we still have so many wonderfully quirky students who aren’t ostracized for being unique but celebrated for what they contribute to the mix. There are artists and jocks and techno geeks and Speechies, and they blend. In my dorm [Goodwin] a couple years back, it was the football player who led the cheer to congratulate the chess player’s big win. Any musician is instantly accorded a certain respect. Coolness at Milton can be acquired in lots of ways.”

Caroline feels that people who are verbal, as in “not afraid of healthy debate” and “comfortable with expressing themselves,” thrive at Milton. “We seem to breed social activists,” says Suzie Greenup ’75, “students who question everything.” All agree that a sense of humor persists here: Miltonians are serious students who don’t take themselves overly seriously.

The mix of boarding, day and Boston is still, also, the recipe for a unique School culture. Milton is urban, and students unfailingly mention Boston’s proximity as a plus. Day families still embrace their children’s boarding friends. Perhaps more than ever, day parents bring their diverse professions in metro Boston to campus, guaranteeing Milton’s connection with the world. On the other hand, with a vigorous dorm culture, students from all over the world, and a very active campus, Milton is the place where you meet incredible friends, and you can count on being with them, having fun, after class and on weekends.

Students “Dare to be true.”

“Sometimes we think that ‘Dare to be true’ means be true to yourself and who you are, do what feels good to you and resist anything that challenges you to do things differently,” Elaine says, “but to me, it means to live with integrity: dare not only to speak the truth, but to reflect on and accept the consequences of your beliefs and your actions.”

What’s different?

“When I came for my interview to work at Milton, I was struck by a tall, black male walking confidently and easily across the quad, hanging out with three or four students of different ethnicities,” says Patrice. “Students of color today feel free to be who they are, and we found it hard to do the same in the ’80s.” Not only are “the demographics different,” as Elaine says, but Milton is truly involved on all issues of differences among people.

“I think the mix at Milton today is terrific,” says Brad. “We weren’t the diverse school—we weren’t the national school—that we are today. We weren’t different racially, or in terms of religion, or socio-economically. I think of it as something I really missed out on.”

“For me to come back, the demographics had to be different,” says Rod. “Before, not many students even had experience living outside of New England. Students today have a much broader awareness of and tolerance for difference.” Milton tries hard to ask the questions, explore the values, and hold the discussions that will prepare students well for their world. “Milton makes you feel uncomfortable in a good way,” says Jane Brewer ’62. “That is, you can never be complacent.”

With tuitions for schools and colleges high enough to preclude most families, financial aid is no longer simply an instrument of socioeconomic diversity; it is a crucial tool to maintain quality. “We want the classroom to be a place of excellence,” says David. “Having vigor in the classroom requires that we attract the top 10 percent of students. For the overwhelming majority of that top 10 percent, Milton is financially out of reach. Having financial aid as a resource is the insurance we need to keep Milton the place we’ve known it to be in the past.”

As the digital culture marches forward, its ramifications are inescapable. Email, texting, cell phones, cameras, and infinite internet options are enticing and demanding. In the “old days” speaking with someone was the main way of connecting. Today, the quality of relationships at Milton is as strong as ever, but “it takes a whole lot more time, effort and focus to build those relationships, because people reflexively use electronics and there are so many electronic distractions,” Patrice says.

Not only does the internet age bring its own pressures, all the alumni faculty believe that adolescents today wrestle with stresses that are completely unlike those in the past. Societal and parental pressure to “succeed” is overwhelming. In the past, doing well at academics and perhaps one other solid skill (a sport, acting, playing an instrument) were plenty to assure matriculating at the most competitive colleges. Today students’ list of responsibilities and commitments goes on and on. Getting into college is a different experience, and the levels of competition are so high that students have to decide what to do well, and then do all the other things also. “You have to be incredibly energetic and organized; I don’t know how students who aren’t make it,” Caroline says.

“Right, and time management is the key skill they all have to work on,” André says. “But they need private time, play time, rest time, downtime. We have to schedule fun time, and when we provide opportunities for simple, old-fashioned fun, they’re really welcome.”

Why do you stay?

When we ask students why they chose Milton they invariably say that it seems to them a friendly, happy place. It seems like a place where really motivated, smart people are studying and having fun. Why do the adults in the community choose Milton, and why do they stay?

“The place feels absolutely alive to me. There’s so much going on. That made it appealing to come back,” says Sally. “And I love being in my department [history]. We talk together constantly, share reading and ideas. It feels collaborative, even though we don’t teach together. We inspire one another.”

“I really enjoy other faculty,” Caroline says. “They’re smart, interesting and funny. They talk about and care about real things. They’re passionately involved people. You don’t see shirkers.”

Meg believes in the importance of representing the School, as an alumna, to potential students across the country, as well as helping make the decisions that build Milton’s classes and figuring out how to apply the financial aid resources. “There’s real value in talking about this place from a firsthand point of view. The admission team all represent different interests; we read and evaluate files with points of view shaped by living with students, coaching them and advising them, even though we don’t teach.”

Suzie sees her work with Milton’s development office as extending her family tradition. “Because it was his family, Milton was important to my father, and my father is important to me,” she says. “I received an incredible education here, and I believe in furthering the mission of excellence. I want to give back.”

“Witnessing what you’ll gain from taking risks is one of Milton’s compelling features,” Patrice comments. “I’m here because of the creative opportunities to make ideas come to life. That requires resources and support, but as a teacher I know that it can happen here. Along with my family, I’m surrounded by music and performance artists who could make that their way of living. The community values the arts, and as an athlete, I’m glad that we value sports as well.”

“I feel like I’m a tree on this campus,” Elaine says. “I’m part of it. I have no objectivity about this place. Being part of family continuity that began way back with Headmaster Apthorp, and my grandmother Esther Williams Apthorp—who taught English, geography and coached (maybe even started) field hockey—is a profound gift. When I drove with my dad cross-country to take this job, Stoky [former athletic director] came into the head of school’s office and told us a story about my dad, back in the 1930s, stealing first base to Cap Hall’s dismay. I love teaching at Milton and I love living with those Goodwin boys. I want to keep teaching the people who are going to make changes in this world.”

“I am never bored; every day has something interesting in it,” says Rod. “You never feel as though you are running in place. Instead you’re doing something meaningful for somebody, or helping get to an idea. It’s a constant state of percolation. It’s hard to imagine a more interesting group of students; the students are really fun. You have an active intellectual life here, and because we dig into complex issues, you have an active philosophical and emotional life, too. Typically, there’s at least one moment in every day when I find some part of my thinking challenged. There’s also always at least one good laugh every day. With all the sophisticated minds around, there’s true wit, and that nuanced humor is so satisfying. Milton is an environment where you feel very much alive.”

CDE

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